Okay, the baby’s had a gender for a while, but now the midwives know, my mom knows, and soon we’ll know too!
(I would use a sonogram picture for this post but I can’t look at them until after the gender is revealed.)
Anyway, at my last prenatal appointment everything sounded great. The baby’s heartbeat was 145 which has been pretty consistent with the last few visits. There was a small concern because I hadn’t gained any weight since my last appointment. I’ve only gained 6 pounds total which is really surprising to me. I feel like I’ve gained a ton of weight because I’m eating ALL. THE. TIME! (It’s so nice finally having my appetite back.) The midwife told me to just keep eating, specifically protein! At the end of the appointment we scheduled the anatomy scan. Even though I wasn’t going to find out gender at the sonogram I knew it meant we were closer to the reveal party!
About a week before the anatomy scan I told Johnny that I was really scared something was going to be wrong with the baby, specifically with the baby’s brain. He told me to quit worrying and nothing was wrong. Twice this past week I’ve gotten really worried something was wrong and then woke up to Facebook posts about babies with the exact diagnosis I was worried about. That certainly wasn’t easing my mind. I had to practically yell at myself one morning because I was freaking out over nothing, but I knew I wouldn’t feel completely better until the sonogram. I was also worried because everything says between 18-20 weeks you should start feeling the baby and I hadn’t really felt anything.
Friday night I had a really hard time sleeping because I was so anxious about the appointment the next afternoon. By the time we got to the birth center I was about ready to puke because I was so nervous! We were called back to the room and it was finally time to make sure all was well with baby. It was really cool to see all the different organs and bones. The heartbeat still sounded great and was still around 145. The sonographer confirmed that everything was normal with the brain. Then she had us look away so we couldn’t see if we’re having a boy or girl. Then when she determined the gender she did some more measurements and everything was looking good. The baby kept sucking on her thumb and it was super cute to watch! One of the coolest things was seeing the spine and the ribs because they were so clear.
Then we started looking at the heart and checking all the chambers. The sonographer told us she saw some odd white spot in the heart and needed to go get the midwife to confirm it. She came back with the midwife and the midwife confirmed that something was there. Then I was no longer paying attention to the monitor because the midwife was telling us that they were sending us to a perinatologist who would be able to get a better look at the heart… She told us not to worry and it was probably nothing but they just needed to make sure. I tried to remain positive at the birth center but as soon as we walked out the door I started crying.
She didn’t tell us what they were concerned it might be so Johnny and I just started googling everything about fetal hearts. One of the things we remember hearing was about the ventricular wall being thicker so everything we read said that could point to a heart defect. As I looked up more stuff online I came across something talking about a white or bright spot on the heart which I remember the sonographer calling the spot that. The bright spots are called echogenic intracardiac foci (EIF). I looked up exactly what all that meant and basically it’s a calcium deposit in the heart. They don’t cause any issues with the heart and most of the time they just go away. So if that’s what it is then we’re being referred to the specialist because an EIF is a soft marker for Down syndrome. The perinatologist will be able to better tell what it is, if it’s anything at all.
Waiting to hear when our appointment with the specialist will be is going to be torture because I would just like to know all is well. It’s reassuring knowing that most likely there isn’t a heart defect. However, I’ve definitely been struggling with worrying about Down syndrome. I feel awful for being worried about that because obviously that changes nothing, but it’s still scary.
On the bright side, baby has been pretty active today and I’ve felt a lot of movement! The sweetest thing was watching Johnny get so excited trying to see if he could feel the baby, too.